What’s Your Story?

In the Steven Spielberg movie Amistad, John Quincy Adams  (played by Anthony Hopkins) asked the character played by Morgan Freeman “What’s their story?” You know their plight,  but what’s their story…who are they, really? Where did they come from?  He was challenging him, as the attorney.  How well can you represent them in court if you know so little about them?

I have walked down a city street and seen a young mother carrying an  “arm baby” and with a “knee baby” in tow and maybe another as well.  I’ve seen those mother’s on numerous occasions turn to the two who were not keeping up ( their little legs and minds trying to negotiate their way through a maze of people going the opposite direction) and yell      ” You better hurry up and bring yo ass on!”

There’s a couple of stories going on here.  That young mom with three to four children, all under 7 and she’s not yet 25 — that’s one story.   The other story, the “knee baby”  (knee baby is a child no taller than the knee of an adult “arm baby” obviously is one still carried around, unable to walk)

That knee baby has a story, yet untold.  As the young child wanders in between the legs of strangers on that downtown sidewalk, crying for the mother it keeps loosing sight of, fearful of being left behind, feeling unloved and abandoned — yes, the story of the knee baby will be told in time. But we need not wait another 10-12 years to hear the toddlers tale, because his mother is telling the story right now.

I’ve often asked myself how can a mother do that? And I’ve come to understand that you can only put out what has been put into you.  Strange as it may seem and as easy as it may be to condemn that mother, the truth is she is a hurt human being — a victim; and her children are the victims of a victim. You can not expect love to flourish where no seed has been sown.

The mother does not know how to love herself and she can’t be expected to love someone else.  Her father knew not how to love himself.     He could not be expected to teach his daughter something he had no knowledge of.  The best thing he knew to do was walk away.

We’ll continue this in my next post.  I’ll leave you with this thought: don’t condemn your parents (forgive them).  They did the best they could based on the knowledge they had.

Have A Great Day!


About nobusysignal

Educated, interested and very much alive!
This entry was posted in Consequences, Forgiveness, life and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to What’s Your Story?

  1. Samuel II says:

    That is so true! People can only give out what they have received. That is why it is so important that we help the generation behind us or they will keep doing the things we hate about our generation or the one before us.

  2. Margaret James says:

    I like the message in the blog. It is very true, and comforting for those of us who are parents of adult children especially. It gives us a way to forgive ourselves for some things that our children may not understand, until they become parents. ….and maybe not even then.

  3. Miss Nae says:

    I work with mothers, old and young. I become frustrated with their lack of understanding when it comes to the needs of their children and I’m angered at what seems to be a willful ignorance but you’re right. These women who abuse their children are victims too. Parenting is a difficult job and I suppose a part of being a capable parent is understanding life from a child’s point of view. But someone who feels that they’ve never had the privilege of a childhood may unwittingly dole out the same fate to their offspring. In the future I’ll try to keep this in perspective and keep an open mind toward my clients.

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